Motherhood, Planners, and Shoes – Oh My!
Before I was an adult and learned how much houses and cars and tax and insurance cost, if you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I’d say “a mom.” I maintained this thought up until about 2 years ago. Ironically, the same time I graduated from college. Let me just take a second to clear the air- I still want to be a mom. I just know that Motherhood will not be my only job. And as sad as that makes me, it’s okay. I can’t tell you how many times “adults” have told me, “Don’t wait until you think you have enough money to have kids. If you do that, you’ll never have kids.” I see their point. But until I have rugrats of my own, I’m just going to keep living my life.
Which is apparently the life of a mother… minus the kids. I’m not sure why. My house is not clean, I’m quite lazy, and I’m terrible at playing Barbies. But for some reason, people think I’m motherly. As weird as this sounds, I think my height has a lot to do with it. For some reason, people think that just because I’m tall I’m older, wiser, and played basketball in high school. Wrong, wrong, and oh-so-very wrong. I can actually remember a time in high school. I was the manager of the varsity boy basketball team. That basically means that I went to each game, sat at the scorekeeping table, and kept the books. Anyways, during timeouts and other breaks, you visit with the other people at the table. One game, this woman asked, “So how long have you been teaching at Lutheran South?” I was 16. That’s ridiculous.
For those of you who know me, you probably don’t need to hear any more. For those of you who don’t, let me further prove my point. My nickname is “Momma Chelsea” and even have an apron that says “Momma Chelsea’s Kitchen”. I cannot even tell you how many times my sister has said, “Chelsea. I already have a mom. I don’t need two. Be my sister.” And here’s the kicker. A couple weeks ago I was at the eye doctor. I was up at the desk checking out and making my follow up appointment. Once we picked the date, I wrote it in my planner. The lady behind the desk said, “Do you need an appointment card?” I said, “No it’s in my planner. That’s what counts.” And she smiled and did that oh-how-sweet-I-empathize head tilt and said, “Oh I know. A mother can’t do anything without her planner! Keeps the family together!”
I understand that I’m old enough to be a mother. But do I really look old enough to have a family that needs to be kept together by the powers of my planner? I’m not quite ready for that. And here’s why.
A status I recently saw on one of my facebook friends’ walls (she has planner aged children) :
“(Name omitted so she’s still my friend) is wondering how my son can lose his shoe at school. How? I try to be understanding about the lunch kits, jackets, homework, books, etc. But a shoe?”
As insanely adorable as that is, I’m not quite ready for missing shoes.
Just so you can all sleep tonight, there was a follow-up status the next day “(Supermom) is thrilled! The shoe was found! I repeat, the shoe was found!”