Archive for May 18, 2009

Weighing The Pros and Cons

Life is all about balance. Give and take. Every decision we ever have to make has options that could be considered. Sometimes we ignore the other options and take the bad with the good. Example: This weekend I was in Alice, Texas visiting family. The church had a potluck after the service. I ate a finger sandwich, some veggies, deviled eggs, etc. and then, of course, I visited the dessert table. Little old Presbyterian ladies make great desserts. Then we got back to my aunt and uncle’s house and I ate another Saltine Surprise because, well, have you had Saltine Surprises?? And these were made with dark chocolate. So… I really had no choice. A couple hours went by of reading and holding baby Sophie (more on her tomorrow!) and I was still feeling quite full. I pulled the ultimate fat girl move and put on athletic shorts with elastic. (Elastic that was digging into my gut and turning me into a human play-dough spaghetti maker thingy.) But then my cousin asked, “Do you want a piece of pie?” Do I want a piece of pie? That ridiculously amazing homemade chocolate cream pie that my uncle made? Let-me-think-about-that-for-a-second-Yes!  In this instance, there really are no other options. If I opt out of my 3rd (who are we kidding.. 7th) dessert of the day, I may feel a little better, I may not bust the elastic on my shorts that were purchased in the men’s section of Old Navy. But I’d regret it. Forever. Because that pie rocks. In this instance, the other options don’t matter.


But sometimes other options matter. Sometimes the pros and cons should be weighed. At one point, I considered quitting Chapstick. For those of you who don’t know, I am severely addicted to Chapstick. (Classic Cherry to be more specific.) And by “severely” I mean that I always have a tube in my pocket. I apply at least 20 times each day (more, depending on what I eat). If I leave it at home, I have to stop and buy a new one. I haven’t gone an entire day without Chapstick in 8 years. I probably haven’t gone an entire two hours without Chapstick in 8 years. It takes me approximately 21 days to get through a tube. It’s bad. Really bad. So I considered quitting. I don’t want to be a slave to Chapstick for the rest of my life. But after some research, I compiled a list of pros and cons.



-I’d save approximately $1.69 every 21 days. That comes out to $29.37 a year. Assuming I live another 55 years, that’s $1615.56 over my lifetime.

-I wouldn’t feel like killing myself every time I couldn’t get my hands on that tube of glory. My lifeline. My brand of cocaine. I would be a slave to nothing. (Except chocolate. And cheese. And sleep. Oh dear. I have issues.)

-I wouldn’t ruin any more clothes by accidentally leaving the tube in my jeans pocket when I throw them in the washing machine.

-My hair wouldn’t get stuck on my lips when it’s windy.

-That’s it. That’s all the pros.



-I might die.

-My lips would bleed for a few weeks until they learned to make moisture on their own again. (This is one of those instances where “use it or lose it” applies.)

-I might die.

-I would cry and Stephen would have to put up with me.

-Each time the weather was dry or I went to Colorado, I’d tempt my addiction again.

-I would die.


So that’s that. Not quitting. The mere thought of it makes me sweat and my heart rate accelerates to a point that makes me question my safety. I’m getting a headache just thinking about quitting. Not going to happen. Glad I considered my pros and cons on that one.


Have you ever made a decision after weighing your pros and cons and then later realized that your one con should have heavily out-weighed your list or pros? Stephen wanted to shave Rookie. A lot of people in Texas shave their dog in the summer. A lot of people in Texas also have outside dogs. We do not. In my opinion, Rookie’s thick fur wasn’t going to kill her in our 70 degree, fully AC’ed house. But whatever. The girl has got to pee and I suppose it’s possible that she could pass out in the 2 minutes she’s outside sniffing out her next pit stop. Also, she sheds a lot. Our house is constantly covered in dog fur. We sweep about every 2-4 days. Each time, we sweep up so much hair that we could build Rookie a litter of baby-Rookies. So shaving her would (supposedly) cut down on all the shedding. Two pros. That’s what Stephen came up with.


I only had one con. She’d look ugly. I think shaved dogs are ugly. They have bushy faces and bushy tails but their bodies are skinny and weird looking. I don’t like it. And I don’t want an ugly dog. But after half of the family argued “the only difference between a bad haircut and a good one is a couple weeks,” Stephen won. Two pros (to the untrained eye) appeared to outweigh my one measly con.


Maybe now if I take all of Rookie’s old beautiful fur and put in on my con side of the scale, it would tip in my favor and I can win and this will never happen again:


My naked dog.

My naked dog...

...that no longer looks like my sweet Rookie. She now looks like a moose. Or a deer.

...that no longer looks like my sweet Rookie. She now looks like a moose. Or a deer.

You can't tell but I'm dangerously close to tears. Mourning the loss of my beautiful BLACK pup is not enjoyable.

You can't tell but I'm dangerously close to tears. Mourning the loss of my beautiful BLACK pup is not enjoyable.


Cons: She is ugly as sin and I no longer want to cuddle her. She doesn’t feel like my Rookie.

Pros: They say blondes have more fun…

May 18, 2009 at 10:14 am 12 comments


May 2009


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