Marital Bliss

June 5, 2009 at 9:10 am 7 comments

No long story today… Just a quick explanation of why marriage is unlike anything you will ever experience.

This morning on the way to work, Stephen cleared his throat. It was one of those nasty, man throat things… where he may or may not have hacked up a hairball. In this instance, it was the former. And it was not a hairball. It was a loogie. The kind that only males know how to produce. (I think they learn this in 4th grade when the girls are in the nurse’s office learning about periods.)

C- I don’t know why you do that when you’re driving. We are on the freeway. Now you have to hold it in your mouth. Gross.

S- (almost incomprehensibly) I don’t get to choose when it happens…

Of course I think this is gross. But I’m also secretly jealous. Why don’t I know how to do that? Last week my head was so full of mucus I thought my eyes were going to pop out. I would have given my right arm to be able to get some of that out. But noooo. I’m a lady. Ladies don’t get loogies. Ugh. So anyways, we finally exit the freeway and get to a stop sign.

Stephen opens the door, spits his treasured loogie, and turns to me, apologetically, with a smile:

S- You’re pretty.

Entry filed under: Chelsea, Marriage, Stephen. Tags: , .

Babies Make Everything Better A Case of the Mondays

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Amanda  |  June 5, 2009 at 9:33 am

    Haha. Cute.

  • 2. Jimbo  |  June 5, 2009 at 10:24 am

    If I am the guy sitting behind ya’ll at that red light, I instantly say to myself “Sick! What a disgusting, non-mannered thing to do! I’m sure his wife really appreciated that. Ugh!”

    I guess I’ll have to change the way I look at random spitters at stop lights from now on.

  • 3. Lindsay  |  June 5, 2009 at 2:42 pm


  • 4. Lauren From Texas  |  June 5, 2009 at 3:11 pm


    Marital Bliss. Don’t you love it?

  • 5. Kristin  |  June 5, 2009 at 5:58 pm

    Ah ha. The hubs calls his wolfskies and they occur all the day long!

  • 6. The Husband  |  June 6, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    I feel like I need to explain, justify, defend myself, but why go through the trouble… it’s gross, bad timing, and unavoidable with allergies.

    Sorry, Babe! (…you’re pretty :^)

  • 7. Seven Quick Takes (vol.7) «  |  September 18, 2009 at 1:51 pm

    […] 3. Every now and then someone new will come to my blog and click around and read old posts. Sometimes someone will Google something totally random and end up on an old post. I’ve been blogging for over 8 months now and definitely don’t remember everything I’ve written so when I see this, I often go back and reread the old post. Here’s one that was visited on Tuesday that made me laugh. It’s probably the shortest post I’ve ever written. Click here to read Marital Bliss. […]

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June 2009


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