Loser 8.03: I’m Used to Pizza, Not Climbing a Hill!

If last night happened to be your first week watching Biggest Loser, you picked a good one! There was drama, tears, backstabbing, temptation, and a million amazing one-liners. I can’t even tell you how many times I thought to myself, “Oh my! I LOVE this show!”

We quickly found out that this week was a week of choices. To start: Would you rather have a 2 pound advantage or keep your trainers for the week? Alison gave this proposal to the contestants. She said that whoever stepped forward first, got the advantage (but had to give up their trainers) and nobody else would have the opportunity. CLEARLY nobody would be dumb enough to take this, so she made it clear that if nobody stepped forward, she’d raise the stakes. Apparently since Tracey was in the hospital the first week and we all felt sorry for her the second week, we didn’t realize that she is an IDIOT. She took a two pound advantage (without discussing it with her teammate, Coach Mo) and gave up the opportunity to work with Bob and Jillian.

Sean said, “I wanted to say ‘What are you doing you crazy woman?” but…. what are you doing you crazy woman?”  Which, by the way, was just one of Sean’s 17 billion wonderful quotes. I think I’d like him to narrate my life. So of course Bob and Jillian are hurt and disappointed and shocked that Tracey would make such a rash (and ridiculous) decision. They spent an hour talking to her about how she needs to have self-control and blah blah blah. She just stared and them and pretended to learn something and didn’t blink. That woman could DOMINATE in a staring contest. For real. How does she not blink for an entire 2 hour episode?

I need to take a quick Tracey break. Let’s talk about Abby. She went to the hospital to get an MRI on her shin because she’s been having so much pain. Turned out she had a pretty bad stress fracture and couldn’t do any land exercising. She didn’t seem too upset. She said that in the scheme of her life, this is not a huge deal. She’s handled much more. I just loved what she said (probably because it was almost verbatim what we talked about in Monday night Bible Study when we talked about Ruth and Naomi and how God can work through our baby steps when we heal… but that’s another story for another time) when she commented that, “I just did what I had to do that day because that’s all that I had. I gave what I could and nothing more.” You’re awesome, Abby. She went back to the ranch and talked to Bob about it. He was secretly concerned for her but to her face he told her that she’d be okay. She’d get through it. Why? Because he has experience training injured people and because there is Yoplait Light in the fridge! Try it! It’s fantastic. (We don’t buy Yoplait because their containers are shaped in a weird way so you get some yogurt stuck in the top lip and it’s almost impossible to get it out. This severely angers my husband so we buy Kroger brand. TAKE THAT Biggest Loser marketing.)

Oh dear, I’m already over 500 words into this post and I’m only half a page into my two pages of notes. (By the way, my notes look very much like a junior higher’s notebook because they are sloppy and have nonsensical  words and doodles like this…)

 

So now onto the first temptation. I love temptations. Each contestant was put in their own booth. Alison brought them 100 calorie cupcakes. Whoever ate the most cupcakes got to pick one person from each team to weigh in that week, the other teammates’ weight loss didn’t matter. All of the contestants were extremely scared to eat a cupcake after the drama with Tracey acting without thinking. None of them wanted to piss off Bob and Jillian. Very wise. And wise Liz said, “We don’t want to put a target on our back! We don’t need that control so soon!” And then wise Sean said, “I want to take a cupcake and rub it all over my body!” And then wise Chelsea said, “I love this show and I love Sean.” You’re right Liz (and obviously you’re right too, Sean and Chelsea). But Tracey decided to eat 4 cupcakes and pin a big fat target on her back. To which to cute brunette girl on the pink team said, “I think Tracey is a little bit… crazy.” Umm, yes. Idiot idiot idiot.

So needless to say, Bob and Jillian are not please. Bob has flames coming out of his ears, Jillian can’t look at her. Then Jillian decides to look at her so that she can scream at her. And it was good. Did everyone LOVE Bob’s imitation of Jillian?! If I had DVR, I would have watched it over and over. So at this point, everyone thinks Tracey is dumb. All we get out of Coach Mo is that this is “extremely frustrating.” Understatement of the century.

The challenge this week was an incline challenge. Each team had to carry 500 pounds up a giant incline. They could choose to do it in 10 pound increments from a close distance, or 25 pound increments from a further distance. The green team won- which is great news for Abby because she can’t do much this week. But even after the green team finished, each team kept going. They all wanted to finish the challenge. When the final weight was carried up the hill, they all walked together. It was awesome. The lesson was beautiful. “If you think you’re alone, you’re not!” (Sermon?) I love when they work together and you can really see them growing and being proud of themselves.

On to the last chance workout. Next awesome quote from Sean after dominating his treadmill challenge, “I don’t even think a puma could get on a treadmill and do this!” Bahaha! We didn’t see a whole lot during this workout. We did see a glimpse of Dina. She wanted to quit so Jillian yelled at her. She eventually decided she didn’t actually want to quit. I love that she said, “Do me a favor, don’t talk to me.” And Jillian just said, “Got it.” I think that we see how Jillian is able to learn each of the contestants and what helps them go on. She knew Dina needed to focus on her own and push herself. Well done Dina!

Afterwards, the pink team and Dan separately talked to Tracey about her choice for their team. They wanted to make sure they were all on the same page. Tracey hasn’t quite proven that she can make a stable decision up until this point, so I’m not quite sure why they thought she’d start now.

On the weigh-in. The drama immediately unfolds. Alison asks Coach Mo what he thinks about Tracey’s decisions that week. (Thoughts or feelings, Coach Mo?) He said that she is his teammate and he supports her and that he can’t change the decisions she’s made. So Jillian blows up. She yells at Coach Mo even though it’s not really his fault. I think she’s just yelling because that’s what she does best. But I do agree that he should have showed a little emotion towards Tracey and told her to STOP being an idiot and start thinking about him when she’s making her decisions.

Now to the scale. Everyone is freaking out because they have no idea who Tracey will pick to weigh in. I liked Julio’s take on it. He said that people need to stop worrying so much. Either way, someone is going to have to weigh-in. So just worry about yourself. Uh yeah! The whole season would be far less dramatic if they’d keep this in mind the whole time. But come on, that’s not good television!

Okay so I can see why Tracey would pick Liz to weigh in. But then she chose Rudy?! Rudy the Beast? Really? So what WAS your strategy?? In my opinion, it’s too early in the game to be pissing people off. Why make decisions that will make the rest of the contestants hate you? Enter pink team. More drama. (Go on, brush your shoulders off.) Then Sean, only lost 6 pounds. No red team dance, sorry Stefanie. Looks like I don’t have to do a vlog demonstrating the dance. Then Shay, more drama. She lost 6 pounds. Daniel is the best teammate ever. He is so supportive and encouraging.

So then it’s Tracey’s turn on the scale. Everyone is literally folding their hands and praying that she’s lost less than 2 pounds. We soon find out that Tracey may or may not be a witch because she somehow loses 11 pounds. ELEVEN. What??? We hear crickets. No cheers, no high fives, no celebratory dances. Just laser eyes and mental curses. So what this now means is that the red team and orange team are below the yellow line. NOOOOOO!

The red team is awesomely awesome. Got that? Fabulously fabulous. Stellarly stellar. Amazingly amazing. They said, “The greatest gift that anyone can give is self sacrifice.” There’s a sermon in there too but, once again, this is not the time! They said Shay needed to be there, had to be there. She didn’t have support at home and couldn’t leave yet. They asked everyone to vote for them. And everyone agreed.

The “where they are now” piece was awesome. Sean had lost 120 pounds since coming to the ranch. He was looking awesome. His wife is about to have a baby girl and name her Jillian. A little much? Seems to be the consensus. I have mixed feelings. Obviously this was a life changing experience for him and I’m sure Jillian made a huge impact in his life. I think it’s kind of cool to give your child a name that represents a really special time of your life. Not sure that I’d name my daughter after a woman who curses more than Snoop Dogg, but to each his own.

But what was really cool was when we saw Antoine. He lost 105 pounds and looks fabulous. We really appreciate that he answered our question from the first week. Who did Alexandra have a crush on? Well Antoine of course! And now they are dating and it’s wonderful and makes me oh so very happy!!

What a great week. Great show. Already can’t wait until next week. Did yall see the preview? Tracey is hurt. “Coincidence or karma?” Ha! Seeing as I don’t believe in karma, I think coincidence. But a funny coincidence. Can’t wait to hear your thoughts!