What God DIDN’T Mean When He Said We Should Leave Our Familes

December 10, 2009 at 9:32 am 25 comments

So listen y’all, I’m all about Biblical marriage. Love, honesty, communication, submission, respect, sex, husband : wife : : God : church, honor, relationship, etc. etc. etc. I get that. I’m not saying that I’ve perfected it. By no means is that true. I’m just saying that I get it and I support it.

Do you want to know who doesn’t get it??


And my sister.

Genesis 2:24 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined with his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

Did you get that? Well don’t worry because it’s repeated.

Mark 10: 7-8 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh.”

I’m not going to write a dissertation about what that actually means. If you’re curious, let me know and I’ll tell you my thoughts and feelings on the matter. What I do want to talk about it what that DOES NOT mean.

Last week I went to my parents’ house to pick something up. I was thrilled to walk in and see their house decorated for Christmas. The big tree covered in ornaments, the snow village laid out across the piano, the smaller tree stuffed with UT ornaments… it was great. I felt warm and fuzzy. And then I saw this.

In the Rosenhagen household, the stockings are hung on the kitchen cabinet with care since they don’t actually have a mantel. I never really thought it was weird until I took that picture. But something is wrong there. Before marriages, there were 5 members of my family. (Mom, Dad, Big Brother, Little Sister, Me) Then Big Brother and I got married and added 2 more to the mix… Laura and Stephen. Did you do that math?? We are now a family of 7. Did you see how many stockings were hung by the kitchen cabinet with care?  THREE.

I have one word for how I felt when I saw that: Rejection.

I immediately called my mom out. I told her that was unacceptable and that I am still a member of this family. When I got married she told me I couldn’t have my stocking because she still needed it, so I ordered super cute ones for Stephen and I from Pottery Barn. And now my wonderful childhood stocking isn’t even being hung? Not okay my friend. NOT okay. 

My mom made some excuse about how they don’t fit very well and Lindsay said that since we weren’t in the house, they didn’t need a spot. Plus she couldn’t find the extra stocking hangers. Hey Little Sister, we may not be in the house but we’re still in the FAMILY!!!  And, what? They don’t fit?? They can cuddle. If my mother-in-law can find space for her daughter-in-law and TWO of her daughters’ boyfriends, my mom can fit her own daughter.

The next day I got a text from my mom. It read, “Will this do until I can find the hangers?”

Yes mom. That’ll do. I’ll take your Christmas present out of the trashcan now.

Entry filed under: Chelsea, Family, Getting Old, Holidays, Marriage. Tags: , , , .

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25 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Jimbo  |  December 10, 2009 at 9:40 am


    I’m looking forward to your mom’s defense in the comment boxes. Heck, my mom has stockings for me, Sarah, and our two dogs on her mantle!

    I think the one you should really be mad at here is your sister. It sounds like she’s pretty much kicked you out of the family.

  • 2. d.a.r.  |  December 10, 2009 at 9:42 am

    Oh my gosh. My feeliongs would have been so hurt!!!

  • 3. Sarah @ This Heavenly Life  |  December 10, 2009 at 9:44 am

    Heh. You lift right out!

    Uhm…is it just me, or is your blog snowing? Do you have any idea what I’m talking about?

  • 4. Alice Rosenhagen  |  December 10, 2009 at 9:54 am

    IT WAS YOUR SISTER!!!!!!! She is the one who hung them and said they wouldn’t fit. Okay okay I did go try to hang them as soon as she left but I REALLY CAN’T FIND THE REST OF THE HANGERS. I guess they will have to stay on the fireplace thingy if I can’t find the rest of the hangers. I am NOT buying new ones cause they are here somewhere! (I really do love you – and the rest of the people whose stockings got dissed!) Maybe this will make your daddy get me a mantel so they will all fit nicely!!! 🙂

  • 5. Lauren From Texas  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:02 am

    Hahahahahahahaha! I don’t have a lot to say except I love this.

  • 6. Marie  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:03 am

    This was too funny. The last part about taking the gift out of the trashcan had me in stitches.

    And your mom is adorable.

  • 7. sarah  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:07 am

    My parent’s mantle looks just like your mother-in-law’s…we are all crammed in there and I guess we will move over to the cabinets once I start having kids and my little sister starts a family too…that is one thing that I give my parents full credit for…they always did a great job with Christmas and being very very welcoming.

  • 8. Kim (Molly's sister in law)  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:10 am

    It’s funny how little things that our parents do or don’t do affect us so much. I don’t know how I’d feel if I went over and my stocking wasn’t hung with care….it’s going to be hard enough seeing John and Molly’s stockings hung with care this year or not hung since they’re IN TEXAS. 🙂 Hope your mom’s christmas gift wasn’t covered in coffee grounds. 😛

  • 9. Samantha  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:28 am

    Ooo, it’s snowing at Roots & Rings. 🙂

    Aww, my feelings would have been a bit hurt, too! It was a cute story, though.

  • 10. Debbie  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:39 am

    awwww. ill hang your Christmas stocking on our mantle! 🙂

    ps – maybe buy them a mantle for Christmas? just throwing that out there.

  • 11. thatmarriedcouple  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:45 am

    Ha! I was all over this before any of us kids were married. I made my mother buy three extra stockings several years ago so she would have enough for everyone when my brothers and I got married! Maybe someday when we have kids of our own, she can lighten up on the stockings – but not a day before then!!

  • 12. Cio  |  December 10, 2009 at 11:15 am

    white people are funny.

  • 13. TiphanyB  |  December 10, 2009 at 11:27 am

    LOL! Thank you so much for sharing! I love how your thought processes work. Who else would have taken being left out of a Christmas tradition back to a bible verse.

    and love the snow!

  • 14. kristin  |  December 10, 2009 at 12:05 pm

    Lol I love ur blog. And yes your blog is snowing….I can even see it on my phone! Love it =) I know what u mean about childhood christmas stuff. I have my stocking still and its awesome….ill have to post a picture. The lady who used to baby sit me made it. Looks like a santa man with my name on it and it has drawstrings like a small back pack type thing. I’m bummed right now cuz ii can’t find our christmas countdown calender. Its made of cloth andhas a tiny mouse you move to each pocket on the calender as the day changes.

    Your blog makes me want to write a blog too. I think u may have inspired me ma’am .

  • 15. abby  |  December 10, 2009 at 12:41 pm

    I love this story! So funny…and true! When my older brothers got married and had kids, my mom decided that only the grandkids would get stockings. I wasn’t married and didn’t have kids, so my stocking hung up with my nieces and nephews stockings. Well, now i’m married and we don’t have kids yet…somehow I lost my stocking. The extra stocking my mom had that was mine? Yes, it now is my dog’s stocking. I guess I can’t be too upset since my dog is still getting love and attention:) It is a little weird to go home and not have a stocking though!

  • 16. Alyssa  |  December 10, 2009 at 1:06 pm

    LOL-love the last line! My mom made a stocking for Matt but we have to bring our stockings to her house when we have Christmas but Santa still fills them up! I don’t even remember what his mom does BUT I do remember there was photo drama because his sister decided to do a “kid” photo and exclude me (I don’t think she likes me and the idea came after our engagement photo made an appearance). Oh well, whatever! I’m glad you got your stockings hung with care!

  • 17. Jessica  |  December 10, 2009 at 1:18 pm

    Fortunately, I don’t think I’ll ever have to worry about that. My dad always quotes Mark 10:7-8 with heavy emphasis on the part where it says the man shall leave. Since I’m not a man, he says that means I can’t go anywhere.

  • 18. Amanda  |  December 10, 2009 at 1:39 pm

    I love what your mom said about your dad buying her a mantle now 🙂
    I don’t really have to worry about this, because as soon as my sister and I moved out and went to college we pretty much stopped celebrating Christmas together as a family. I mean, we all live in 3 different states thousands of miles away. Then my mom had all the Christmas stuff in storage and it got ruined by rain. No family ornaments. No stockings. Nothing 😦
    So now we each just do our own thing!

  • 19. jill  |  December 10, 2009 at 2:05 pm

    Aw! I’d have been hurt too! Though not that I think about it, I don’t even know that my mom hangs our stockings anymore. My mother in law never got rid of my hubby’s though, and has had one for me long before I was ever her daughter in law.

    Personally I think your sister needs a good butt kickin, just so you can show her you’re still the boss, hehe 😉

  • 20. Amber from Girl with the Red Hair  |  December 10, 2009 at 2:19 pm

    Hahahaha, awww. Well at least your mom hung your stockings after, I suppose…

    I’m sure your lil sis will understand more when she has a husband of her own!

  • 21. Court  |  December 10, 2009 at 4:05 pm

    Haha, this is priceless. It gave me a good laugh. I am glad your stockings were hung with care, finally.

  • 22. Maureen (MIL)  |  December 10, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    I’m ready to add more stockings too! hint hint! just kidding! (well, sort of!) I know your mommy loves you MUCHO! and your sister loves her big sis!

  • 23. Tabaitha Kaye  |  December 10, 2009 at 9:27 pm

    I completely agree with you on this. However, it’s my mom who is great at this and my mother-in-law who REFUSES to get extra stockings for the new family members. She has a stocking for all of her children and even her grandchildren and makes them open them up first, while all of the spouses sit and watch. My sister-in-law even commented on how unfair it was and this was her response “if they want to get their own stockings and bring them to the house, that is fine, but they won’t be filled.” What are we, chopped liver? Needless to say, none of her kids agree with her, but she is too stubborn to change her mind.

  • 24. Rachel  |  December 10, 2009 at 10:39 pm

    HAHAHA. Sometime I would really like to hear your thoughts on the whole “leave the family” thing because I have some thoughts on that myself… 🙂

  • 25. Kristin  |  December 11, 2009 at 1:39 am

    Oh heck no mama. SO uncool!

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