Rookie Mistake

December 23, 2009 at 9:56 am 17 comments

I have a great dog. She’s smart and loving and so stinking cute. At night time she stares at me when she thinks it’s time for me to go to bed. She runs to our bedroom, waits a few minutes, then runs back out to find me and just stares at me. This repeats until she’s too tired to care, then she just lays on the floor by my bed. She does the same thing then it’s time for me to get up in the morning. Somehow she knows weekdays from weekends, don’t ask me how. But she’ll fuss at me and jump up and lick my ear if she thinks I need to get up. She’s never been wrong.

She knows a lot of English. Hungry, thirsty, bone, toy, outside, potty, room, night night. She gets all those, and she obeys. She has a bit of a problem with “Please don’t jump on our house guests” or “I’d rather you not pee all over the floor when people come over” but we’re working on it.

No matter the time or place, if we say, “Rookie go to your room” she’ll run into the nearest kennel.

Case in point. A couple weeks ago we kept our pseudo niece and nephew while their parents went to Galveston for a terrible anniversary weekend. So Pancho and Leia spent some time with Aunt Chelsea, Uncle Steve, and Cousin Rookie. We had a great time. Pancho hid from Rookie and Leia while they played and sniffed each other’s butts. Then they all napped.

Pancho loves Uncle Steve. Since Pancho stole the good sleeping spot, Leia had to settle on this.

Sweet pups! But that wasn’t my point. See how small they are? They share a kennel. A kennel that is still significantly smaller than Rookie’s kennel. So one evening we were about to head out the door. We told Rookie, “Go to your room.” And this is what she did.

Is that not the cutest thing you’ve ever seen?

Want to know what is not the cutest thing you’ve ever seen? Besides the explosive diarrhea, of course. Rookie’s hatred for the mailman. I know it sounds cliché, but it’s true. The mailman is the only person on the planet that Rookie hates. Fortunately she is kenneled during the week so we avoid drama those days, but on the weekends… watch out.

Our mailbox is actually just a slit in our door. Our mailman literally drops the mail into our house. Rookie does not enjoy this. She thinks he’s going to kill his momma. And since she doesn’t like the mailman, she doesn’t like anything he brings. Every time he comes, she goes nuts. Growls, barks, runs all over the house. The hair on the back of her neck sticks up. She looks terribly vicious. And then he starts to put the mail through. She transforms herself into a rabid werewolf a la Taylor Latner and takes care of business.

And we end up with this.

Mail with holes. This was a particularly vicious day. I think it was because Stephen and I were at work and my sister was hanging out at our house. Rookie really wanted to make sure she was safe. Every piece of mail that day had holes in it. THROUGH the envelopes and cards. You could literally hold them up and see straight through them. In multiple places. You know what comes in the mail this time of year?? Christmas cards. My apologies go out to my cousin, Natalie, who now has a hole in her body. And to Taryn. I’m sure it wasn’t personal. I don’t think Rookie can read, so certainly she didn’t know that card was from you and Drew. Or maybe she did and she wanted to toughen your dog up.

The world may never know.

(Giveaway ends tonight. If you haven’t entered, do it.)

Entry filed under: Chelsea, Rookie, Stephen. Tags: , .

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17 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Lauren From Texas  |  December 23, 2009 at 10:01 am

    I laughed OUT LOUD when I saw that picture of Rookie in Pancho & Leia’s crate! Thanks again for watching them, I think they had a better time than we did.😉

  • 2. Alyssa  |  December 23, 2009 at 11:20 am

    That’s hilarious! Our key phrase is, “Go to bed!” and Emma will go to her kennel or if we’re at someone’s house, she’ll hide in the corner. Sometimes she gets mixed up and gets in the kennel with Shadow which is a tight squeeze.

  • 3. Southern Gal  |  December 23, 2009 at 11:27 am

    That IS the cutest thing evah! How did you train that dog to be so obedient?

  • 4. Pippy  |  December 23, 2009 at 11:43 am

    That picture of rookie in the crate is sooo cute! I love that she tries to eat the mail when it comes through the slot, so funny.

  • 5. jill  |  December 23, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    That picture of your Rookie in that crate is hliarious!

    It reminded me of Chris Farley on SNL but we could change the words “Fat dog in a littlee crate” (not that your dog is fat, but that is what the song says)🙂

  • 6. DebbieQ  |  December 23, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    LOL! We tell Max to go to bed and he just runs right down to his “house” (Maxwell’s House, get it…..). And when I was growing up we used to have a dog that also hated the mail coming through the slot. She destroyed the new mortgage book one time…the bank wasn’t happy or understanding.

  • 7. fritz  |  December 23, 2009 at 12:38 pm

    when my dog hobbes was younger, i used to tell him it was time for bed and he would immediately go to his kennel, now he just goes next to the bed, waits a few minutes until he thinks we are asleep the goes and sleeps on the couch…

  • 8. John  |  December 23, 2009 at 12:54 pm

    That’s hilarious!

    Truman, my dog, usually just destroys furtniture… he’s never touched our mail before though!

    Sincerely,
    John
    http://fatherhoody.blogspot.com
    (I will steal your readers… muhahahaha)

  • 9. mom  |  December 23, 2009 at 2:00 pm

    I will never stick my hand in your mail slot!

  • 10. Maureen (M.I.L)  |  December 23, 2009 at 2:21 pm

    I’m still laughing at the picture of Rookie in her cousins kennel, and the “holy” mail! Aww, she is so cute!

  • 11. Ashley  |  December 23, 2009 at 2:29 pm

    I’m just glad Fenway isn’t the only one who pees on guest/the floor! I’ve just started warning people, it’s really the least I can do.

    Your poor mail… better the mail than anything else like your couch though🙂

  • 12. Rachel  |  December 23, 2009 at 3:45 pm

    So since Stephen partook in the nap time, does that also mean he was a part of the playing and sniffing each other’s butts? I sure hope not.

  • 13. Stephany  |  December 23, 2009 at 10:32 pm

    With my old dog, Minnie, who died in June 2008, she would sit by my door and just stare at me until I went in my room for the night. And she was an early to bed dog, so this process started around 9 p.m.

    With Dutch, my dog now, he just cuddles with me on the couch, but every time I make a movement, he gets up and looks at me with a hopeful “Please tell me we’re going to bed now!” look on his face.

    That picture of Rookie in the kennel is priceless! I lol-ed real hard!

  • 14. Samantha  |  December 23, 2009 at 11:58 pm

    Dogs provide so much entertainment, I love it! That picture of Rookie in the crate was too cute.

    I could completely relate when you mentioned the not jumping all over house guests or peeing all over the floor when people come over. Our pup gets so excited to have someone over that she pees herself. While jumping all over them!

  • 15. Kyla Roma  |  December 24, 2009 at 10:31 am

    lol!! Oh She looks like she’s saying “Look! I’m good!” I’m doing what you say! I love you!” Poor kid!

    My puppies eat mail too, one time they ate all our wedding pictures in one afternoon. They made it into confetti! lol

  • 16. Erin  |  December 30, 2009 at 8:34 pm

    I needed a laugh…thank you!🙂

  • 17. Oh For Pete’s Sake «  |  January 17, 2011 at 7:19 am

    […] when I told you about how much Rookie hates the mailman and tries the destroy the mail? You can click here if you want a refresher or if you’d like to see the proof. Here are the basics: Our mail […]

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