Loser 9:04: A Great Episode Without Any Good Quotes

Michael’s mom is gone and he’s sad about it. The contestants talked to him about his attitude and his work. He said he’s going to step it up. We’ll see.

Pop challenge. Run The Presidential Mile, grab a key card, come back and test the key. You can either get a check or an x. The first team to three checks, wins immunity. My guess is that the Presidential Mile is not actually a mile. Tough break for Michael, can’t get a good card! My guess is also that I want Alison’s coat. Poor purple girl isn’t getting anything either! And lookie there, the red team won immunity.

“With great power comes great responsibility.” The red ream team had to give out three envelopes: No Gym Access, No Elimination Vote, and 2 Pound Disadvantage. I think this is mean. This is Biggest Loser asking for drama. It’s not fair to the red team. No Gym Access went to John who spent most of his time in the pool (smart). They gave the No Vote to Michael so he wouldn’t make any rash moves this week based on hard feelings (smart). And they gave the 2 Pounds to the green team since they had a bad week last week and they hoped they’d have a good one (not a BAD move, any choice they made would have been bad). GREEN TEAM IS NASTY. Nasty.

Bob decides to talk to the red team about the weigh in. Melissa is sticking with her story that she isn’t playing the game. He’s choosing to just drop it. Bob and Jillian sneakily separate Lance from the group so Jillian can confront him. He’s sticking to the story as well and has also decided that he’d no longer like to work with Jillian because he doesn’t respect her. NICE MOVE. Be mad and refuse help from the best trainer in the world. Very very smart.

I think at this point, Melissa has convinced herself that she’s not playing the game. Biggest Loser Simple Swaps. Melissa has convinced Lance to go back and give Jillian a shot because they need her. Ziplock.

Challenge time. Alison is look like a cute little construction worker. They don’t look like that in real life, trust me, I know. The players have to pull themselves up 120 feet in this contraption. The winner gets phone calls from home and the ability to give phone calls to three other teams. Green team is immediately pissed because they think they won’t get chosen. Well, YEAH. Maybe if you smile every now and then! This is brutal, it’s a lot harder than I originally though it looked. Hate the red team if you want, but man alive, they are fighters. Gray team won. Atta boys. “I told myself I wasn’t going to cry on this damn show.”

They chose to give the calls to the red team, the green team (who didn’t cry… what?), and the brown team John. Great choices dudes!!! The phone calls always pull on your heartstrings. They also give you a little glimpse into their home lives, which I like.

Brita. Subway. Bob takes he contestants to Subway for their lesson on eating then takes them outside for their last chance workout. He points to a mountain and tells them they are climbing. Daris (orange team) starts running back and forth to get extra exercise in. Well done! Then ask they reached the bottom of he mountain, Jillian was waiting o put them through more hell. Man, she really made them do some crappy stuff. Throwing giant rocks and chasing them, pushing each other in wheelbarrows, crawling. Fun stuff. They actually looked like they were having fun.

Weigh in time! Alison has ruffles and a bumpit. Ugh, she’s so cute. Let’s just say that I’ve had it with the green team. I’m ready for them to go.

Red: Melissa (11) & Lance (6) – 3.16% Immunity
White: Michael (15) – 3.18% He’s lost 70 pounds is 4 weeks!
Black: Andrea (5) & Darrell (10) – 2.37%
Orange: Cheryl (6) & Daris (6) – 2.38%
Pink: Ashley (7) & Sherry (4) – 2.10%
Brown: John (10) – 2.29%
Gray: Sam (14) & Koli (12) – 3.78% Rockstars!
Purple: Stephanie (6) – 2.54%
Green: Migdalia (4) & Miggy (1) – .67% — arms crossed, angry at the world. (For the record, the 2 pound disadvantage didn’t matter.) 

OH THE GREEN TEAM! Awful. Bitter. Angry. Migdalia started crying and Miggy told her not to cry. NOT OKAY. We are women. WOMEN CRY. So then they screamed at the rest of the contestants to vote Migdalia off. Whoa nelly. These women. There are just no words.

The contestants voted Migdalia off- just barely. She started at 265 and is now 219. I have nothing else to say.

Anyone see the preview? We watched it on DVR so we missed it.