Will The Real Chelsea Please Stand Up

August 11, 2010 at 9:20 am 24 comments

Last week Stephen and I had dinner with another couple. Afterwards, we played this game called Wits and Wages. (I think?) It was a really fun game, highly recommend it. For the most part, you really don’t have to be that smart, so it’s right up my ally since I’d be playing with my husband who doesn’t ever forget a bit of trivia, a rocket scientist who knows everything, and a rocket scientist’s girlfriend who I assume also knows everything. I did pretty well. In fact, I won two of the 4 games we played. In two sentences, this is how the game is played: A question with a numerical answer is asked and everyone writes their guess on a mini dry erase board and then sets them out on the betting board. Then you place poker chips on the board and bet on who is right, or “most right.” So you see, you don’t have to answer correctly, you just have to guess who did!

At one point the question was asked, “In what year did African-Americans get the right to vote?” My answer was something like 1960. Stephen gave me that “Oh you’re so cute because you are SO SO SO wrong” look when everyone else showed their answers and I was about 100 years off. The answer is 1865. In my defense, I was thinking more along the lines of when African-Americans truly got more freedoms. Regardless, I showed them how dumb I really am. And now you know… And it feels good to get that off my chest.

In the spirit of true honesty, here are a few more confessions. Don’t judge me, just join me!

1. I have no idea how big an acre is.

2. I don’t use even close to the recommended amount of laundry detergent.

3. This week I have to buy new underwear for the second time in my pregnancy, due to an ever-expanding butt and thighs.

4. I go WAY too long between haircuts. Way way too long.

5. I often get really sad that my best friends live so far away. I wonder if I’ll ever have a best friend in my city again.

6. I don’t even slightly understand electricity.

7. If I never watched another movie again in my life, I think I would be okay with that.

8. Sadly, I think Jansen’s hiccups are annoying unless I’m laying down and watching my belly. But when I’m sitting up, trying to do something, I don’t enjoy them.

9. When people talk about breastfeeding in any sort of detail, it grosses me out.

10. I absolutely hate the phone and ALWAYS prefer an email.

11. If my last name was longer than one syllable, I’d love to name a daughter “Jane.”

12. I judge people who don’t check their email regularly.

13. My husband has vitiligo. And while he hates it, it’s one of the things I absolutely love about him. I love learning his skin.

14. I quit reading Wuthering Heights in the middle of the book because it took too much brain power to pay attention.

15. I absolutely hate small talk with people I’ve known for a long time. I’d rather just not talk at all.

16. There is a difference between being honest and being inappropriately transparent. Many bloggers and facebookers cross that line.

17. This morning I ran out of deodorant after one armpit so I’m wearing a different scent on the other armpit.

18. I haven’t been to the dentist in over 3 years. The last time I went, I cried before my appointment.

19. I don’t have much sympathy for stay at home moms who complain a lot. You get to be home with your child, stop your whining!!

20. I got glasses when I was two. I got contacts when I was in 5th grade and swore I’d never wear glasses again. I’m now 25 and want glasses again.

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Entry filed under: Chelsea.

Ten on Tuesday (42) No Idea

24 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Stacie  |  August 11, 2010 at 9:30 am

    9. I’m glad I’m not the only one.
    10. AMEN.
    14. My absolute favorite book ever. I don’t think we can be friends.
    15. Amen, again.
    16. Totally me.

    Doesn’t it feel good to just let it all out?

  • 2. lazyhazysummerdaysies  |  August 11, 2010 at 9:42 am

    You are NOT dumb. You have a unique skill set. Besides… Rocket scientists and their girlfriends do not hang out with dumb people. It would annoy them to no end!

    #5 is something I can definitely relate to. So is #13. And #14. I thought it was dreadfully boring.

  • 3. lazyhazysummerdaysies  |  August 11, 2010 at 9:50 am

    Whoops. Not #13. #18. I can’t do numbers sometimes.

  • 4. The Stephanie  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:27 am

    5. Me too. 😦
    9. Um, AMEN!! Seriously! have you heard the radio ads they’re doing now? Disgusting!
    10. Ditto. Every time my boss asks me to call someone, I immediately email them. I hate talking on the phone.
    12. Ditto again. If you have an email account, you should check it regularly, and then when you do, feel free to hit REPLY!
    16. That goes for Twitter too. There’s one in particular that I may have to stop following. LOL

  • 5. Stephie  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:28 am

    #1 – Me either!
    #4 – I usually do too but I’m trying to get better about it.
    #5 – I feel that way all the time. I have friends here, but it’s not the same.
    #12 – I live on gMail.
    #14 – I’ve never heard of it, but you’ve got me wondering what it’s about.
    #20 – I recently got contacts and I still can’t give up my glasses. After so many hours wearing them, contacts just aren’t my friend so I love being able to put my glasses on at night.

  • 6. Autumn @ One Boy and Two Cats  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:37 am

    #2 Apparently applies to toilet paper with me…
    #10 I have friends who make fun of me for being a phone hater
    #15 Silence with people I know well is a joy to me
    #16 Now I’m worried… have I ever crossed that line?

  • 7. That Married Couple  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:43 am

    Ditto to 4-7!

  • 8. Karen  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:43 am

    1. I didn’t either until I purchased my house so I could have an understanding of it, that was about 8 yrs ago, but I could not tell you now. lol

    2. I probably use too much.

    4. Me too, my hair grows like weeds, I hate having to deal with it.

    6. Again, I did research when I first moved in to get an understanding and know how of how to save, but I could not tell you now.

    10. Me too, that’s why I have an answering machine, great little invention there.

    11. That would be cute, Jansen and Jane, I say go for it.

    17. Interesting, the gov’t would pay millions for the research.

    18. I’ve got you beat, I’ve never been to a dentist in my whole life, most people don’t believe me because my teeth are white and straight, I just tell them it’s called “brushing your teeth more than once a day,” and having parents with straight teeth.

    19. Seriously, shut up!

  • 9. Mama Fuss  |  August 11, 2010 at 11:01 am

    1. Neither do I
    2. I think I come close. Sometimes.
    3. I hate that. I bought underware 3 times at least during my first pregnancy. This time, I bought some early on. They were too big at the beginning, and are now getting almost too small.
    4. I haven’t had a haircut in 9 mos. I trim my bangs at home periodically.
    5. Amen.
    6. I have a vague idea.
    7. That would make me cry.
    8. Amen.
    9. Does that mean you’re not going to? It used to mildly creep me out, until I educated myself about it.
    10. I love the phone if it’s to chat w/ a friend, but would prefer doing anything professional/business oriented, etc. via electronic options like email. I hate making appointments and such because I have to talk to random people on the phone.
    11. Jane is a perfectly nice name. Even with a one-syllable last name. I’d probably only avoid it if your last name was Smith.
    12. Me too.
    13. No clue.
    14. I’ve never read it. Seriously.
    15. Don’t know that I have a strong opinion on this one
    16. I see your point, though sometimes I think I am guilty of the latter.
    17. I’ve done that. At least you didn’t skip it.
    18. I had to go a few months ago for bad tooth ache. I will have to go again after the baby is born. I want them to give me drugs. Like valium. I hate the dentist.
    19. I think I might have to take offense here. Nobody loves their job all the time. I love my kid and I love staying home with her, but some days she drives me up a wall. (she’s still better than my old boss, who was at least old enough to know better)
    20. I got glasses in 5th grade and contacts in 8th. I swore I would never go back to glasses and with few emergency exceptions, I haven’t. I wouldn’t go back to them now if you paid me a lot of money. I would only go back to them if they told me I would go blind otherwise.

  • 10. rachel  |  August 11, 2010 at 11:07 am

    I hate phones too, as does my husband. In fact, he is the only one I will absolutely pick up on no matter what (and he does the same with me). It’s been really bad since we’ve moved – I screen my calls ALL THE TIME. It’s actually rather liberating after being a secretary/in customer service for 4 years when I had to answer the phone, even if I didn’t feel like it.

    And yes, I agree. What is the point of having email if you only check it once a week/once a month. It’s just rude.

    And my old hairdresser would just laugh at me when I called because she knew how long it had been. Luckily my new one has NO idea what she has gotten into yet 🙂

    And I also long for a best friend I can call up and know she’ll want to go grab coffee on a whim. Sigh. It’s hard having your close friends be 3 time zones away. It causes me to spend much of my day on Facebook/Skype/the dreaded phone trying to get some semblance of a connection so I don’t feel alone in the world. And I love my friends, I really do. I just wish they were closer.

    And for an original confession: I used to be super anal about following recipes to the T. And for the most part I still am, because it works best with my neurosis. But occasionally I step out and just dump things in – I feel so naughty when I do that 🙂

  • 11. Southern Gal  |  August 11, 2010 at 11:08 am

    Ooh. As a CDA I’m begging you, please go to the dentist! Go every six months and you will have no nasty surprises when you get there.

    Our Nora Rose was almost Nora Jane.

    Quitting Wuthering Heights is understandable. Have you tried The Guernsey Literary and Potato Pie Peel Society? Try it.

    I love staying home and will never complain about it. Never.

    You’re too cute.

  • 12. KT  |  August 11, 2010 at 11:12 am

    My husband didn’t go to the dentist for 7 years. I made him go before our wedding. He then had 4 cavities and had to come back for a second cleaning. I would HIGHLY suggest not putting it off- who wants to be losing teeth at age 45?

  • 13. Debbie  |  August 11, 2010 at 11:21 am

    omg I love you. period. can i bribe you with something to be my friend? but, then again, i guess that doesn’t solve #5.

  • 14. Veronica  |  August 11, 2010 at 12:18 pm

    I like random posts. I don’t get electricity either. To me it’s magical. And yea stay at home moms who whine – they are crazy; it bugs me so much.

    Hope you’re having a great week!

  • 15. kelly  |  August 11, 2010 at 12:20 pm

    when we went to float the river 2 weeks ago, someone brought a game called racko. i immediately thought of you, and that if you didn’t already have it, you would really like it.

    glasses are awesome. wait til eyemasters or a place like that does a sale and go get you some! it makes your eyes feel so much better when you sit infront of a computer all day long.

  • 16. TiphanyB  |  August 11, 2010 at 12:50 pm

    3. I only had to buy new underwear once, but now- after the pregnancy, neither my old ones or new ones fit “right”. I hate to even think I am going to have to try a new brand.

    4. Same here, which is why I always look like I am trying to grow my bangs out.

    5. Wait till Jansen grows up a little… I’m sure you’ll find “that couple” that you always hang out with because your boys play so well together. 🙂

    7. I love movies. I would have to disagree with you on this one.

    10. Absolutely agree. Or if you’re a friend… text.

    11. What’s wrong with Jane Hurst? I think it’s sounds very noble.

    19. Was just talking to someone about what my dream job entailed… I would absolutely LOVE to be a stay at home mom, and once my kid(s) are in school I would use my “free time” (LOL) to draw/ paint & sell my art.

    20. I go through phases as well… It’s nice to give your eyes rest by wearing glasses. They get more oxygen that way.

    And for the record… I haven’t been around online much, but I read your blog daily in my RSS feeds. 🙂

  • 17. Lauren from Texas  |  August 11, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    Jane Hurst does sort of sound like a noble author or something.

  • 18. zburrows  |  August 11, 2010 at 2:07 pm

    It is weird when you write something that I know is about me but I am not expressly named.

    Remember the day I said “i am not good at alphabetical order”? That is still kinda funny.

    Want to hear something that annoys me? When I got to starbucks… Yes i got to starbucks… i might always go to starbucks… at least i dont smoke or drink… and a person orders their drink and goes and stands right in front of the barista. No, the other ten people standing around without drinks arent waiting… they are just hanging out. Then they continue standing there even though a drink is called out with another person’s name…. and that person whose name was JUST called has to say exuse me… to the IDIOT who is standing there blocking the bar. annoying.

  • 19. Nora  |  August 11, 2010 at 2:34 pm

    This: I often get really sad that my best friends live so far away. I wonder if I’ll ever have a best friend in my city again.. So true for me as well. It makes me incredibly sad.

    And I laughed out loud at the deodorant thing. That’s kind of funny.

    I love these.

    You rock, as usual.

    Here are a few of mine:
    I’m terrified that I will marry the wrong man one day.
    I can’t imagine my life without Jack (my dog) and am pretty sure I won’t want another one after he’s gone.
    I’m afraid of being underwater.

  • 20. Rachel  |  August 11, 2010 at 4:44 pm

    What’s worse than your number one? I’m married to a farmer, live on a farm, have conversations at least every other day that involve some sort of mention of acres… and I don’t know how big an acre is. I should probably learn… but if I ask Andrew I’ll feel dumb and like a bad wife.

  • 21. Katy Livingston  |  August 11, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    I LOVE the name Jane! We are having a girl, and our last name is longer, but I can’t get anyone on my team. I am probably going to settle for it as a middle name…

  • 22. Cousin Kim  |  August 11, 2010 at 10:06 pm

    This was a great post! I learned some stuff about you that I didn’t know!

  • 23. Taryn  |  August 12, 2010 at 8:06 am

    3. lol. been there, done that.
    4. me too. just got my first haircut in almost a year the other day.
    5. In the same boat. they’re in california and texas and new york. it sucks.
    10. That’s why i text. 🙂
    19. agreed. it’s your choice. don’t complain.
    20. i got glasses when i was 6. Contacts when i was 13. Lasik when I was 27. It was the best $$ I’ve ever spent on anything in my entire life!!!

  • 24. Sarah Johnson  |  August 12, 2010 at 11:37 am

    5. I too get very sad that I don’t have more friends here- but it was nice to know that we aren’t the only ones who have trouble making friends and that even if I did move to Austin/Dallas/Houston where friends are, that doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll automatically all be best friends. Life happens.

    11. I love the name Jane too, but not sure if it is okay to name a daughter Jane when I have a dog named Janey.

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