Oh For Pete’s Sake

January 17, 2011 at 7:17 am 16 comments

That was my tweet last week. “Oh for Pete’s sake.” It was the only thing I could manage to get out that I wouldn’t regret. “My ****** dog” and “Are you ****** kidding me? I will kill her!” did not seem very nice.

Okay y’all, see through my anger. I do love my dog and, for the most part, she is kind of awesome. But every now and then she does something to make me remember that she is an animal and could very well live in the woods on her own and be just fine. DO YOU HEAR THAT, ROOKIE?

Do you remember last year when I told you about how much Rookie hates the mailman and tries the destroy the mail? You can click here if you want a refresher or if you’d like to see the proof. Here are the basics: Our mail comes through a mail drop directly into our house, Rookie hates the mailman, sometimes she chews up the mail as it’s coming through the slot. She got in big trouble earlier this year and has been good ever since.

But, well, last Thursday she out Rookie’d herself.

My mother in law was at our house, as she is every Tuesday and Thursday, because she gets to watch my baby those days. They were relaxing on the world’s most comfortable recliner (seriously) and Rookie was hanging out at their feet. Jansen was asleep and I’m not quite sure about Rookie, whether she was asleep or not is irrelevant as far as I’m concerned.

The mailman approached the door, Rookie didn’t see him coming. As he began to push the mail through the slot, she fah-reaked out. She hopped up and with the speed of an African sprinter, she hauled it towards our front door. The problem with sprinting indoors is two-fold. 1) It is very hard to slow down when you need to. 2) You run into things.

This is what we call foreshadowing.

This is what our front door looks like from the inside.

Yes, the grout is disgusting. It’s stained. I don’t want to talk about it unless the conversation involves you giving me lots of money to hire someone to tear up the floors and install some wood. What I really wanted you to see were the windows on either side of the door. They are these little foot by foot windows running from the floor to the ceiling.

Look there on the right. There is a giant television stand pressed up against the windows. Why, you ask? Well we don’t usually have it there. In fact, it was in the hallway for us to take to Goodwill. But it had to get moved because my IDIOT DOG didn’t stop running and ran smack into the glass.

Do you know what happens when you run at full force towards a window and hit it with a pointy snout? That’s right. It breaks. It shatters and flies down your walk way and (thankfully) misses the mailman to avoid any law suits. It also scares the crap out of your mother in law.

So I get a call at work telling me about the incident. I was this close to telling my mother to letting Rookie out the front door and not letting her back in. Ever. But I love that dog something fierce so after going on and on about how much of an idiot she is, I finally asked if she was okay. She was. She got a gash on her front leg that was bleeding a bit but seemed to be okay.

We ended up taking her to the vet on Friday evening. (And by “we” I mean “Stephen,” as I almost always do when it comes to errands that I dread.) The vet said that she could have had a stitch put in, had we brought her in sooner. I don’t really know if I believe that, I think that doctors will put a stitch in the flu if you let them.

She’s fine now. She’s healing like a champ. She may or may not have learned her lesson regarding the mailman. Stephen talked to the mailman on Saturday and he said she scared the poo out of him. He thought she was going to come flying through the window.

All those posts I’ve written about my smart dog? Ignore them. I don’t care if she can go to her room when she sees us putting our shoes on, or if she can go find Stephen for me if I tell her to. She doesn’t understand two very basic facts. The mailman is not evil. And just because something looks clear, doesn’t mean there is nothing there.

For Pete’s sake.

Entry filed under: Hurst Castle, Rookie.

A List Ten on Tuesday (63)

16 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Southern Gal  |  January 17, 2011 at 7:45 am

    You must have very clean windows around that door…

  • 2. jen  |  January 17, 2011 at 8:03 am

    that is a classic “dumb dog” story!

  • 3. abby  |  January 17, 2011 at 8:21 am

    I’m trying to laugh quietly since I’m supposed to be working. But seriously I can’t hide my laughter!! I can so totally understand how upset you were and yet how much you still love her! Why do dogs have to do dumb things as soon as you think they are maturing? My dog got my breast shield yesterday and hid the.entire.day with it. It was at least 6 hours. He only came out because we were skyping with my parents and he could hear them and thought they were at our house so he wanted to see them. (See? They really are smart! Even though they are dumb!!) 🙂 Hang in there…tomorrow Rookie will probably do something genius:)

  • 4. Darla Baerg  |  January 17, 2011 at 10:04 am

    That’s hilarious (to me). I’m sorry she got hurt and your window got broken but it is funny. 🙂

  • 5. Janet (Bonnie's friend)  |  January 17, 2011 at 10:06 am

    Oh my…your story reminds me of when we had a border collie who leaped through a sliding glass patio door in the middle of a winter night! Can’t remember what set him off, but later was told that the paranoid gun toting neighbors next door heard the crash and after checking out their backyard for what caused the noise, they spent the rest of the night huddled together in their closet!!

  • 6. The Stephanie  |  January 17, 2011 at 11:05 am

    Ok, I know it wasn’t funny at the time, but it sure is funny to read. LOL

    Glad Rookie’s ok tho 🙂

  • 7. Faith  |  January 17, 2011 at 12:24 pm

    Our family dog did that with the sliding glass door. Luckily there were no injuries to the dog or the glass. Hope Rookie heals up ok! I haven’t read the previous mail posts & while I think it’s awesome that you still have a on foot mailman (especially in Houston) have you thought of putting a mailbox on the house by the door & not using the mail slot? Although I absolutely love the idea of a mail slot & would miss using it.

  • 8. Nora  |  January 17, 2011 at 12:25 pm

    Ick, what a disaster. I’m glad that the mailman made it out unscathed and that Rookie is ok for the most part!

  • 9. Aunt Bonnie  |  January 17, 2011 at 12:47 pm

    I vote with #7. Face it….Rookie has never met the mailman and never will, most likely, so there will be no friendship there. You could have a mailbox on the street like most people and it’s not so bad. However, you can put a mailbox on your house vs. the slot. Could be a real problem solver.
    Funny post!

  • 10. Holly  |  January 17, 2011 at 12:56 pm

    Ha ha … sounds like something my dog would do 😀 Hope Rookie heals quickly!

  • 11. Ashley  |  January 17, 2011 at 1:35 pm

    Poor Rookie. She didn’t mean to… sort of. At least she isn’t constantly trying to steal clothes and receipts like a certain puppy I know. And don’t get me started on how often I have to wash my bed cover because she sneaks bones on it when I’m not looking. Rookie could teach Elly a thing or two as long as it doesn’t include the mailman is evil.

  • 12. maureen aka emmie aka MIL  |  January 17, 2011 at 3:39 pm

    It happened so fast, that it was almost in slow motion. I didn’t even think to check on the poor mailman. Rookie was SO good when I bandaged her up, she let me clean her wound, and bandage it, and all she did was look away while I cleaned her up. But, why oh why did it have to happen on my watch???? Oh well, it will be a great story that Rookie and I can look back on and laugh! She is a great dog, very very sweet, and obviously a good protector.

  • 13. Heather (SIL)  |  January 17, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    hahaha—I was wondering what the mailman thought of the situation!
    Oh stupid dogs
    We just switched out our beds, so the bed in our room has a ‘foot board’ now when we didn’t before. Jack runs full force to jump on the bed and rams his head into it every time now. I just laugh.

  • 14. Taryn M. Peine  |  January 17, 2011 at 7:40 pm

    Poor Rookie! I think she’s just ticked she never wins Publisher’s Clearinghouse 🙂

  • 15. Stephany  |  January 17, 2011 at 7:56 pm

    Bahaha! This story is friggin hilarious…prime blogging material! Rookie was just looking out for you! 😉

  • 16. Kathleen  |  January 18, 2011 at 2:35 pm

    I am right there with you on the crazy dog front! Our dog attacks other dogs and recently forgot how to use the bathroom outside. Fun!

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January 2011


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